January 19, 2025, 9:13 am | Read time: 5 minutes
Does my cat like me, or am I just the “can opener” for her? Some may wonder this when their cat meows loudly for food again and again. But there are many signs by which you can recognize how much your cat loves you.
Does the cat really love us when it purrs around our legs, or is it just a strategy to get attention? Unlike dogs, who greet us with a wagging tail when we come home, cats often show their affection in more subtle ways. Many people, therefore, wonder whether the love they have for their pets is just as great on the other side.
Cats are social creatures and capable of close, emotional relationships – even with their humans. They show their affection again and again – just in a slightly different way than we humans do. You can tell whether your pet likes you by the following behaviors.
Following You Everywhere
If your cat follows you wherever you go, this is a sure sign that it likes you. They often change rooms when we leave them. For example, when we move from the living room to the bedroom. These social animals like to be close to us. This can even go so far that the cat follows you to the toilet.
Rubbing Against Legs or Hands
Cats rub themselves against objects, but also against other cats, to create a kind of group odor. The animals excrete certain pheromones through glands on their cheeks, which they use to mark their territory as well as their humans. This is the animals’ way of saying: “You belong to me.”
Cats also show this behavior with visitors with whom they do not have a closer bond. But observe how your cat does this with you. The animals often show much more vigor and literally throw themselves at us – often accompanied by loud purring.
Showing Its Backside
If your cat sticks its bottom out at you and lifts its tail, this is not just an invitation to follow it but a clear sign that your cat likes you. This behavior comes from the early childhood of animals. Mother cats groom their young in the anal region to trigger the release of urine or feces until the kittens learn to do this on their own. The kittens react to the mother cat’s attention by lifting their tails and presenting the anal region. This reaction is a reflex action of the animals.
The behavior is so deeply rooted that it is also retained in adult animals – in a modified form. It is an inviting gesture towards conspecifics. It can be understood as an invitation to make contact but also as an invitation to follow. Cats also often show their bottoms to humans when they feel comfortable and want to express affection.
Head Bunting
Cats have various greeting rituals. One particularly intimate one is the so-called “head rub.” This involves the animals rubbing their heads and cheeks against conspecifics – or even their humans. On the one hand, scents are released through the glands on the cheeks, and on the other, cats seem to particularly enjoy being touched in this region.
Some of them literally headbutt their owners because they are so impetuous. Cats also often rub their heads against our hands when they greet us or cuddle with us. But no matter where your pet rubs its head on you – it is a clear sign that your cat likes you.
Chirping or Chattering as a Greeting
Another form of greeting is the so-called cooing or trilling. This refers to a sound that can best be described as a mixture of meowing and purring. It sounds something like a high-pitched “Brrr.” Mother cats use this sound to signal to their offspring that they are approaching. It is, therefore, a kind of greeting.
Later, adult cats use cooing when they meet familiar conspecifics or when they want to invite them to play. The animals also greet us humans with this sound. Therefore, cooing is usually a sure sign that your cat is very familiar with you.
Lying on People
Cats love to lie on warm surfaces. However, this is not the only reason why they snuggle up comfortably on your lap or stomach. They usually actively seek physical contact. Cats also do this with familiar and beloved conspecifics.
But don’t worry: just because your cat doesn’t want to lie on your lap doesn’t mean it doesn’t like you. Some animals prefer less direct contact. They usually just lie close to their favorite person or in close proximity.
Kneading
Another behavior from our cats’ childhood is milk kicking. Kittens massage their mother’s teats with their paws to stimulate the flow of milk. Adult animals also show this behavior when they feel comfortable. Cats also massage objects such as soft blankets or pillows. In humans, however, this behavior can be seen as a sign of trust and attachment and is a real sign of love.
Grooming
A sure sign that your cat likes you is mutual grooming. The animals mainly lick our hands, but also our hair. This also happens when there is still some delicious-smelling leftover food on our hands. As a rule, however, grooming is a sign of great familiarity. Cats often only show this to each other in their circle of family or friends.
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Love Bites
One behavior that we humans often misunderstand is love bites. Cats show their closeness through physical affection and sometimes bite tenderly into the hands or cheeks of their humans when cuddling. As a rule, the animals are very careful when doing this. However, intensive cuddling and stroking can also lead to overstimulation and a kind of energy build-up in cats, which then “discharges” in the form of a bite. However, if the cat bites tenderly and purrs loudly during intensive cuddling, this is a manifestation of deep affection.
About the author: Dr. Saskia Schneider holds a doctorate in biology. During her studies at the Free University of Berlin, she focused on zoology and animal behavior. In addition to her training as an editor, she trained as a behavioral consultant with a focus on cats.